tHe haPPy grOUch

tHe haPPy grOUch

Friday, April 25, 2014

Well, since I couldn't sleep, I'll blog.

I did sleep, fairly soundly for 2 or 3 hours. Then came the fast moving cycle of awake, asleep, awake, asleep... etc, etc, etc. Then, in between the awake parts, was this strange dream...  I can still see it as a movie, but can't properly recall it in writing. It looked a lot like the old Mad Max movies, weird surroundings, costumes, strange vehicles, battles...   It was about a group of people trying to get somewhere. I don't even know what our destination was, but we were traveling. I remember feeling very afraid in most of it, just trying to stay alive and get to our end point. I don't know if we ever did; I woke up.
Yes, easily psycho-analyzed, I know.
Funny that my brain made it into something like Beyond Thunderdome...

I am still frustrated that my hours are being cut at my "other job". First Wednesdays, and soon to be some Fridays. Wednesdays I won't miss. It's the last day of the week that I have Dawson, and I'd much rather spend that precious time with him. And one day doesn't hurt the purse too badly. But Fridays too?? Perhaps as often as every other??? Now, it's no big secret that I have been less than thrilled with this job, but it's a job, and I need that. And I work hard (and honestly) when I'm there. And still, I am the outcast. I don't fit in. I'm not part of the pack. 

Off topic... I had an "I miss my dad" moment last night. Completely random. Well, not completely... Troy and I were watching a DVR'd episode of "Fargo" (delightfully weird show, by the way!)... They started talking about gum, Hubba Bubba, to be exact... And I nearly choked on my dinner. That was always how Dad greeted Dawson.. "Hi Dzadzu!", Dawson would say... "Hubba Bubba!", Dad would reply...
It's those little things that come out of the blue and get you, right in the gut. I miss my dad. A lot.

The move to Troy's apartment has been painfully slow. I'm still in Glenburn, for now. But we hope to make the move this coming week. Most of our things are packed, and we've lugged a lot of it down into the garage. Still, nothing has made it's way into the portables! Waiting for extra helping hands to get the big stuff into them first (hutch, entertainment center, dressers, etc). The entertainment center itself weighs about 400 pounds. Yuk... I still may need to rent one more portable. Still looking for bodies this weekend to help us lug stuff. Troy looks big and strong, I know. And as much as he'd love to think he can move it all single-handedly, he's not supposed to be doing any of it. Between his back and his heart, he simply can't. So, we need help. 

Speaking of moving... I hate to even mention it (for fear of cursing ourselves), but it appears that we have a house all nailed down. We've been working on it for a month or so now. Oddly, it was a man who responded to my "housing wanted" ad on Craigslist, rather than something that was advertised. His family lives in Vermont, but he owns a home in Veazie. Him and I have been talking via email and phone, and his current tenants finally were able to show us the house this week. We loved it, and we love the neighborhood. We spoke again with him on the phone and nailed down some details. He seems like a very reasonable landlord, and a very nice man. We have sent him our references, and he is preparing a three year lease (we wanted long-term). It's a very large, beautiful colonial in a wonderful cul-de-sac neighborhood. The house isn't ready until July 1st. So, the waiting begins.

I am not happy about having to move twice, sending my dogs to my mother's temporarily, storing all my stuff, living in an apartment for two months.... But I just keep reminding myself- the end is worth the means. A temporary inconvenience, all for the greater good.

And I'm trying (albeit perhaps unsuccessfully) to be one of those people who counts my blessings every morning I wake up...
I woke up today (even though I hardly slept). I have two jobs (for now). I'm not homeless (yet). My daughter's not pregnant (that I know of)...
I jest, of course.
I woke up, I'm breathing, I'm alive! My kids are healthy and well cared for, and happy (most of the time!). I have one job and work family that I love. I have a wonderful husband. I have a great family, nuclear and extended. I have at least two very, very close friends, and a handful of extended friendships. I have a beautiful home and neighborhood to look forward to...

Ba humbug.