Friday, June 17, 2011

Have I really not written for nearly two months? And there’s been so much to write about. How very odd…

Since my last entry, Troy and I have been to Boston for his Cardiac “workup”.
Although his ejection fraction has improved since this time last year (up to a whopping 25%), his cardiologist still writes- “His MRI today continues to show severe left ventricular dysfunction with moderate right ventricular dysfunction”. He is considered a class III heart disease patient.
Since our visit to Boston, I have had more than my usual (what I like to call) “holy shit moments”. Those are the moments where I realize that this big, strapping man in front of me is actually very, very ill. And that, god damnit, he may not be around as long as I’d like him to be.
Although, based on my hot and cold behavioral habits, Troy would argue that I often times don’t want him around at all.


I’ve been in school now for over a month. These summer classes are very intensive, as they compress an entire semester into 7 weeks. So far I seem to be doing okay. Pretty well, actually.  This week, my Communications professor emailed to ask if I would be interested in the honors program at UMA, as she was thinking of nominating me. Now, I’m not familiar with the program; I’m not even sure if it’s anything more than a status. But it sounds good, and I was flattered. My English papers have all come back with exceptional grades. Which is good, considering I’m an English major. Thank goodness my blogs aren’t graded… I have a love affair with parenthetical speech, the ellipsis, and fragmentizing.
I’m looking forward to classes ending this month, and spending the next two months enjoying the summer with the family. In the fall, I’ll be hunkering down with a full class load. We’ll see how that goes.

Hercules is still stable. As stable as he can be for a dog with multiple neurological/orthopedic issues. He’s still managing the stairs, doesn’t fall down (unless he hits one of the few non-carpeted slippery spots on the floor), and simply looks like he’s drunk most of the time.
Anselmo is still as sweet and slobbery as the day he came to live on Fitz Lane. He’s a good boy, even though he stinks.
They are, easily, my best friends.

Speaking of dogs…
I have introduced the idea of potentially adding another to the household. Before you say it, yes, I am crazy. Why on earth would I get ANOTHER dog when I already have 2 HUGE ones, 7 cats, and 5 people in the house??? Plain and simple- I don’t know. Maybe I am becoming a pet hoarder. But I don’t think so, as pet hoarder defined is- keeping higher than usual numbers of animals as domestic pets without having the ability to properly house or care for them, while at the same time denying this inability. Ok, so I do have a higher than normal number of pets, however, I don’t fit the last part of the description, so I can’t be a hoarder. My house isn’t small (although it is becoming slightly more confined due to added people and pets, lol), and my yard is enormous, with a fenced in area. And we are financially capable (so far). So, the questions goes from Why? to Why not? J

The kids are well...
Logan is 16 now. I honestly can’t grasp that concept. When did I become old enough to have a 16 year old? How did that happen?
I count my blessings (or I at least try to), that she is such a good kid. I see these other teenage girls; they focus on their boyfriends, they dress inappropriately, some are “goth” or “emo”, they’re not doing well in school, they have no moral fiber, they’re not thinking of their futures… And I thank the lord, or the universe, or whatever, that my girl is not any of those things, and in fact, essentially the complete opposite.
The one thing I am unhappy about is the fact that she’s considering a college in Vermont. Can’t she stay here, at home, with Mommy?
Dawson and Kayli are like Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum. I suppose that’s a good thing. Hell, it could be worse. I know, I’ve seen it, experienced it.
Dawson continues his weekly visits with his therapist. I’ve seen an improvement in so many areas with him. He is adjusting to his new living circumstances, both here and at Dad’s. His frustration level (his quick temper) has become less of a problem. He still suffers from a lack of self-esteem, and I’m not sure why. We are working on that. He still has a difficult time with maintaining focus. We are working on that too. Academically he struggles, but not noticeably more than his classmates, so it is still workable. My absolute LAST resort is to have him tested for ADD. We will see how the immediate future goes.
Kayli is a sweet, sweet girl. Sometimes so well behaved that I still look for a microchip, or some wiring, or some other clue that will prove my hypothesis that she is, in fact, a robot. Then other times I am reminded that she is, after all, just a kid.

I’m still adapting to having “other people” living with me. I’ve never been good at co-existing. Not with significant others, not with roommates, and barely with my own children.
Just ask Liza. She came to stay with me for a couple weeks, when she thought she couldn’t tolerate living with her grandparents any longer. We thought it would be great, since we were best friends. I suspect it didn’t take her long to miss her screaming Meme.

Well, I suppose I should wrap this up and do something productive. I have a 4 page paper due on Monday, a 10 page research paper due in two weeks, two separate communications assignments due on Tuesday, two (thick) chapters to read, laundry that needs washing, floors that desperately need to be vacuumed, and a lawn that’s screaming to be mowed.

I certainly shouldn’t be bored.